Monday's Rain by Nicole Barth [12/26/11]


Raindrops coated your eyelashes
as you made your way to the navy van.
Lakota’s coffee and tribal chairs were waiting for you.

The light changed.
Three blocks away from your morning routine.

Two ends of the same string.
Hundreds of miles away, but I felt your tug 
as you slammed the van’s door shut.

Grey splatters on an otherwise blank canvas. Bitter cold.
A smirk. You'd had the same thought as me,
as we looked out of our bedroom windows.

Forced out of hibernation.

The shirt I never wore remains folded in my oversized suitcase.
Your detergent clings to its fibers.

My frozen fingers pressed the phone closer to me
as you mentioned your new wool scarf.
A Christmas present from your mother.
Laughing, I told you I had received one as well.

But I’d rather borrow yours.
The wool warm around my neck
as you would wrap your arms around me. 

Close to You by Nicole Barth [12/20/11]


My moon, my man is miles away and this song is out of key.

The raindrops type gibberish against my window.
So take it slow, take it easy on me.

There’s nothing to do but inhale
the musk of an unused room
and get lost in the fabrics of a forgotten closet.

But tonight,
 if I were on the streets,
I would follow you.

I’d pull you around a corner and down the cobblestones in Brescia.
The road barely wide enough for two.
Communicating through telepathy.

We’d be delicate and alone.
The puddles and crumbling houses as witnesses.
A sigh as you squeezed my hand.
Enough to tell you I felt the same way. 

Never Let Me Go by Nicole Barth [12/11/11]

The seaweed of my morning hair lay splayed out in your direction.
Buried under layers of wool and tattered cotton,
polished skin dreamt of your embrace.

Your muffled breathing kept the responsibility of the day at arm’s length.
The static from your arms coursed through me.
It was humming in my veins as I breathed you in.

I was born in a city of flashing lights and discord.
I screamed out love songs from the ends of my fingertips.

And you can call this what you want…
Your song is never ending.

Time cannot lessen the calm in your voice,
the confessions in your lips or the child hiding in your laughter.

I cannot be returned.
So I’ll keep listening to the pulse of this Sunday afternoon.

The heart is hard to translate.  
I’m going to lose my mind between the pages of a journal.
Every gesture recorded in a trail of fascination. 

All These Days by Nicole Barth [12/6/11]


The etchings on the golden floor have no effect on me.
Stale expressions follow you as I pass the stain glass windows.
I am the letter that will never be read.

Clenched jaw and ratty hair.
Hunched over a lopsided desk with only midnight musings for company.
My bleeding pen is the odometer for my silent lips. 

So tell me that you want to dance.
Give me the stare you saved for cold December nights.

 Tonight I am the penny too short at the register,  
the spelling error in your dissertation
and the sigh I won’t expel.

A snarl that plays in your chest.
The sound of your nails tapping against the marble countertop:
it ricochets off telephone lines.
You can’t hide the crease in your brow.

I’m not afraid of anything—even time. 

The Looking Glass by Nicole Barth [11/30/11]

Say my name and every color illuminates.
Your voice is the liquid lullaby that pulled me from my sleep.

Keeping time with the cadence of your breaths,
I reflected mirror images back at you.
Palm to palm,
 I traced the sound of laughter
across the ridges of your hand.

The quiet sighs and unspoken syllables.
I would write them all down if I only knew how.
Thousands of words and I couldn’t seem to command them.

You whisper
 through quivering fingertips and lavender caresses.
 I’ve been scrawling your poetry.

I’ve seen it in the lightning. I’ve seen it in you. 

Only If For A Night by Nicole Barth [11/21/11]

You’ve caught me with eyes wide open.
Technicolor daydreams spill out the memory of you. 
Hazel to azure. 6’3 to 5’6.
The silk of your hair.

And these city lights don’t compare
to the beams that shine through the floral curtains of your room.
You keep me between the waters of your heart.

I don’t need the fame or the night.
 I don’t want the crowds. They never seem to stay.
I’ve lost the anchor around my waist.

Don’t need the taxis blaring in the background for guidance.

My fingertips know the contours of your face...
the pause in your words.

And I heard your voice as clear as day. It was so surreal.

I will leave my body.
I’m smoking out the harmony that sleeps in you. 

Fish Eyes by Nicole Barth [11/11/11]

The ethereal voice caresses my veins.
Steady drumming fuels
every teenage melodrama
echoing in my mind.

I’m so heavy, heavy in your arms.
The rhythm's frantic laughter pulls me in.
I was a heavy heart to carry, but you never let me down.

Freeze me in a shuttered moment of a camera’s lens.
Breathe unmistakable silence into me.
Lace your fingers with mine and
steady the mind that paces in abandoned corridors.

Painted eyes look for the seawater crashing within you.
Wash away the glass shards and layers of coal
that knot my stomach.

This will be my last confession.
I whisper but it’s no secret.
I was a heavy heart to carry, but you never let me down.

Soundtrack of My Summer by Nicole Barth [10/1/11]

I can show you the beauty of open silence.
Run your hesitant fingers over the grooves in the Mahogany tree’s bark.
Breathe me in.

For you are the breathless hummingbird,
the henna tattoo that curves through my skin
and the midnight traveler
wandering through the galleries of my mind.

Let your chest rise in time to the swaying stop lights
as you paint me with your fluid philosophy.

Your eyes are the backdrop of my daydream.

Bring Me Down by Nicole Barth [9/4/11]



Five stanzas, seven aspirations later and my hands are mute.
Hundreds of miles away and I feel you breathing down my neck.

Your shadow eyes hunt for the cracks in the surface.
The trees won’t glisten today,
the rosemary scent is weak within the varnish of my hair
and the Esmeralda you know has vanished.

This mental stutter...

Only sawdust boots and unmade bed sheets.
The dynamics of water figures shifting across a dance floor.
No semblance of home.

Can you feel this pulsating mind?
The owl fixates on you.

Frigid by Nicole Barth [8/14/11]

She never wanted fake flowers.

Maybe it’s the way the dust settles on the tulip petals
or how the sickly stems never seem to catch
the light that trickles in at 4 p.m.

Slouching in the cracked leather of a mistreated couch,
she wonders why no one ever told her that
the loneliest people are the ones
who always speak the truth.

Spindle fingers wrap around
the cord of a silver rotary phone as 
she gnaws on her cuticles. 

Hollow eyes blink mechanically from a gaunt face.
Busy signal.

The Echoes by Nicole Barth [8/12/11]


She’s the kind of girl who will step outside to be alone.


Lost in her daydreams,
her olive oil eyes skim over the sea of concrete
as her wandering heart beat keeps time to the click-clack of
impatient taxi cabs lunging over speed bumps.


Yesterday’s rain water is now  a looking glass
as the girl made of lilac lullabies is overtaken
by the scent of shaved grass that brushes past her lungs.


A rusted pocket watch hangs from her neck.
Within it resides a watercolor sky and a fistful of pennies she has yet to discover.


And all the little screws that have struggled to keep
her restless hands from twitching are coming undone as
she glues herself to a park bench.


Flustered fingers leaf through a never ending stream of
dog-eared portraits,
poorly hidden smirks
and imagined lyrics before finding
a blank page.


The watch’s hands have frozen.
Trembling, she tilts the page and scrawls a confession.
Underlined twice: your smile.

Resonance by Nicole Barth [7/26/11]

Bright eyes, trace the skies and sing me
your hidden soliloquy.

This drumming noise is deafening behind the curtains of my chest.
And it starts when you're around...

My rabbit heart will choreograph
the unsteady rhythm of my breaths as your smile
washes over me .

Your fish eye captures me in an unexpected moment—
drenched in a sea of Birch trees and glass water.

We wrap ourselves around the Lipstick Building
and make our way into the layers of light.

Your theories rest against the walls of my mind
as the constant stream rinses out the chaos of negativity.

Your hand in mine.
Sweeter than heaven and hotter than hell.

De La Vega Dreaming by Nicole Barth [7/12/11]


I found myself in Central Park South,
having caressed the velvet oak
and coal of a carriage horse.

Drunk on the perfume of hoof polish and oats,
my feet carried me behind the hand-crafted walls of the southern entrance—
my fingers skimming the cracks between the infinite Granite stones all the while.

I've been sucked out of the present
and thrust into the caverns of my mind.
Here, in the middle of tar streets and blaring truck horns...
 underneath the towering cubicles and the repression of the daily grind:
a secluded tree.

It's all too familiar as I catch my breath
and picture myself sitting on the green bench
—whose paint has been chipping away for the past six years
and sketching. 

A tale of two trees so enamored, they'd melded into one another?
Or a rejection letter that had cut him to the quick?
He'd reached out to her and twisted back in on himself,
curving and retracting his feelings down to the very trunk.
A tortured soul, or an egocentric life form?
I'll never know.

A violin sings,
a second-hand serenade kissing my earlobes.
Into the land of Andrea Bocelli love songs and midnight laughter.

And before I knew it, I'd been led into a daydream more lovely than reality.
I'm back in Spain, skipping on the lake in a chiffon dress,
the crescent moon glancing at itself in the mirror. 







Italian Suitcase by Nicole Barth [7/9/11]


I've emptied the jars of myopic dreams
and poorly thought out plans
and given myself space.

Space for flip-flop tan lines and Italian accents.
For gut-busting pasta con ragù in Emilia-Romagna,
for callused fingers running through salty hair.

Escaping from treadmills,
I'm the runaway robin peddling on a rusted bike.
Creaking gears and heart shaped dimples.

Free from car exhaust and garbage trucks,
Nonna Lina's garden calls my name.

A place where telepathy and hand-written letters are 
the only form of communication.

I'm laughing under the Magnolia tree. 

Respiro by Nicole Barth [6/18/11]


Welcome to the new exhibition.
The portrait hangs proudly in the center of the room,
as its paint strokes pull you in.

Glistening, the brine forced her to shed
the lacquer of hesitation.
Embraced by the endless warmth of the sand, she exhales.
Graceful fingers patiently reach out for you as the sun
kisses her burnt sienna skin.

Tresses the color of smoldering branches
transform themselves into Spanish moss.
Emerald eyes question you from an oval face.

She smirks, all the while radiating tranquility.
The secret of her new beginning is hers and hers alone.

Tambourine Lover by Nicole Barth [6/9/11]



Don't tell me you can't hear me through the looking glass,
when I can feel your every move underneath my skin.

The mood is set.
You already know what's next.
You're dancing between mirages and silhouettes.

No teasing, you waited long enough.
Dancing between the cracks in the walls—
feel the treble course through your fingertips.

A sip of air;
you float through the corridor of dreams.


Hip cocked.
The shadow's eyes are on you.

Four Years, a Tassel and a Kiss by Nicole Barth [5/27/11]

Fear can stop your loving,
love can stop your fear.
But it's not always that clear.

Streets feel strange.
The smirking tulips and lilac lullabies
caress the air
as I make my way down
Central Park West
in my burgundy cap and gown—
three inches too long.

You paced the corridors of my mind
as my calloused hand met another and another
until my blushing cheeks
were coated with fuchsia, primrose and crimson lipstick.
Endless embraces. A river of memories,
and your boat floats among them.


Lonely Dove by Nicole Barth [5/14/11]


You're staring blankly as
 the cracks in your window sill 
accumulate the dust 
of faded euphoria.
Is it ever me you're thinking of?

Or do the car horns muffle
the blaring of unanswered questions
shredding your mind?

Five blank pages in the sketchbook. 
 The ink stains my fingertips as
 I trace the scrawled confessions.


Do you breathe in the memory
of late night laughter and dropped calls?

Vainglory, Vice and Victimization by Nicole Barth [5/3/11]


Flabbergasted by visions of fame,
the full-figured puppet feigned victimization by a brute
nearly three times her age.
A victim—or merely a coy game of cat and mouse?

Some say the tempestuous fear vibrating through
the ribcage of his faithful wife—
merely
a heavier psychosis
and a warped view on her life.

Cementing herself to cracked,
hardened ground
wouldn't have shielded her
from the black tables spinning endlessly
in the room of her flaming suspicion.

The affair of a life time—supposedly.
An irresistible muse for portraits of almond eyes
and indiscreet noses.
Call it symbolism, call it irresistible inspiration.

Call it the jagged edges of betrayal.  




**This poem was inspired by the marriage of Olga and Picasso and his torrid love affair with Marie-Thérèse--a girl who was three times younger than Picasso at the time. 

Posada Pintada by Nicole Barth [5/3/11]

The liquid sea of memories,
strumming its notes through the familiar
strings of the harp playing in the abuela's
old soul.

The pleating in her worn face
holds the kaleidoscope
of conversations, wine and suspended shadows
dancing across the
celestial bliss in the distance.

The amber hill is coated
in the exhales of a couple at peace.

Underneath the ink-stained plague
of expectations, duty and tradition is a man.
Resplendent in the vitality of a new day.

Drenched in a peacock shawl,
his confidant and faithful spouse
dons the pride
of that elegant bird
as a silent flute echoes the
unspoken words and half-hidden smiles
between them.


**inspired by Picasso's "A Spanish couple in front of an Inn"

Viscous Fear [5/3/11]


This keyboard knows my name.
Hushed, pregnant with expectation.
The room oscillates—

a victim to the tension shrieking
its way through my shoulders,
my spine,
my trembling fingers.

Fists of unknown gargoyles
kneed their way into the lining
of my stomach.

Lack of oxygen. Bleeding cuticles.

Layer upon layer:
anxious mutterings
and clacking of keys,
all pouring themselves
down
my tightening throat.

Lurking in the corridors of my clouded mind.
To what end? To what beginning?  

Crashing Cars, Dying Stars by Nicole Barth [4/22/11]

**inspired by "We're OK" by the Rescues and "Weeping Woman" by Picasso. Please keep this in mind while reading the poem. Below is the painting and the song. **


She streaked the indigo sadness through her hair

with every brush-stroke,
leaving a single strand
drenched in the crimson
of the heartbeats from a distant day.

The loved. The remnant. The triangular path through her face.
Go home, go home.
She watched it all burn down.

But she's got to start a riot.
Got to start a war against the
silver cracks in her facade.

She'll burn the cologne-filled trench coat
lying on the suede love seat.
Desert sand, weighing her down.

Agony. 
Paint the house green.
Rebirth, rebirth.



Night Fishing by Nicole Barth [4/22/11]

If I could fish the light
out of the ocean, I would.

Bury myself into the watery abyss
of shimmering fish scales and momentary silence.

I'd invite you to dance along the fossilized fish hooks
—paralyzed with their anticipation—
and sink beneath your iron expectations.

Your gluttony for all that you think you know...
The cemented castles of your belief looming high above you:
leave them rotting along the pavement
as your lungs fill with the impregnated salt water.

Let your water-color memories bleed
into the obsidian of the night.

Exhale your toxic dreams.



*inspired by "Night Fishing at Antibes" by Pablo Picasso

#?!%!! by Nicole Barth [4/21/11]


The Plague of first period lecturing
barreled on ad infinitum—like Protestant Fathers
in the years of 666.
Surely, we were experiencing the Hell
the Londoners believed in,
sitting in this puerile classroom
with the heater on full blast.

The—last thing I want to be learning about.
Great—is my need to stain this bleached dress of mine with true soil; with Missouri mud.
Fire—whoever decided to chain me to this chipping desk so early in the morning.
1666—reasons why I don't want to be here.

Pinched the nerve between my tolerance and sanity
as he did/could/will shove another unwanted dose
of syntax and single verb conjugations
down my throat.

Bleed the pen dry.
Punch the patience out of you.

Layer upon layer of typed brushstrokes:
Edit. Delete. Destroy.
Blank canvas: new document.
Zero willpower.

Train car epiphany.
I have orphaned the
hectically sketched optimism
—thriving within the tea-stained pages—
in the abyss of
blackboards and deadlines.
Strike two. 

I'd Make You Beautiful by Nicole Barth [4/13/11]

Oh, I could paint you grey,
for all the promises we've made.
I could paint you clear
'cause you're still lovely to me.

You're scattered between the field of clovers,
near the rifles we burried long ago.

I could paint you red,
to show you how your syllables
course through me.
I could paint you gold—malleable laughter.

And all the things we talked about,
farther and glistening
with miles of concrete in between.

Or I could paint you imperfectly,
with the fear in your eyes.

I could paint you clear.
It's not very colorful,
but you're still lovely to me.  

EAST and WEST by Nicole Barth [4/4/11]


Choking on my own key strokes,
I can feel you lingering between
every stanza as the memory
of you washes over me.

Where do you think you're going with my heart?
I thought I'd successfully disposed of this seasick feeling.
You've got me oscilatting like a pendelum
as I sway between denial and a tarnished need.

But you're more than...more than.
The mellifluous tone of your voice
—like vapor—finds it's way into
the caverns of my mind.

So maybe I'm stuck in a world of
scarlet gowns and second chances,
but your midnight confessions
leave me catching the breath that rattles in my chest.

Oh, and these ink stained pages will tell me otherwise.
But I'll dig my feet into this upward slope
until the panicked fingers of uncertainty release their grip.


LOVE (noun):

 A million paper cuts aligned in
perfect formation—like blinded soldiers.

They'll tell you it means unmade bedsheets,
laugh lines that have etched
a home in your face—
grinning silence.

But love is just a responsibility.  

*written on [3/3/11]

14,800 by Nicole Barth [2/21/11]


You are that diary entry—
written in a frantic scrawl,
you are those tattered pages
that have been dog-eared,
twisted in every which way.

I've run my trembling finger over
the well-known lines.

The broken spine,
the lop-sided angle
you've decided to balance on. 

And every memory,
every soliloquy and
every good for nothing sketch,
all the ink that's been shed...
Every key beaten into submission.

Demanded—expected creativity.

An ocean howling
the could have beens,
the should have beens

—and murmuring my name.  

The Spiral Staircase by Nicole Barth [1/12/11]



I am the leaping embers
from the simmering coal
beneath the slats,
The curve in your spine—
the slouch in your shoulders.

I'm the lingering burn
that trickles down your throat,
into your chest cavity,
before the vodka caresses
your lungs.

I can't be the down
that floats across
your skin.
I won't be
the lullaby that whispers
in your ear.

Because the minute you've
seen the silver you are bathed in
is the minute
you won't need me
anymore.